Afternoon on Haight
- A small man in a slightly undersized decorative sombrero eats a salad on the sidewalk next to a brand new Audi R8 sports car. He tells me and a few other people, “That’s my car. You can have it. For free.” He waits a beat and adds, “I’ll pay the taxes.”
- Whole Foods is selling only organic broccoli. We have always been at war with Eurasia.
- A questionably homeless man violently kicks a vending box belonging to a free weekly newspaper. He yells that it is 4pm on a Sunday afternoon. One of the people standing next to him says, “I gave him a dollar an hour ago.”
- Four members of a surprisingly pleasant five-man folk band stand in a vestibule on the stoop leading to an apartment. Their keyboardist is alone on the sidewalk.
- The angular-faced man leaning on a parking meter and quietly touting beans for sale is actually selling beans. (This one is false.)
Welcome to San Francisco.
